I decided to answer a facebook question for my 1st blog and someone asked-- whats it like to be you?? I have thought about that question for hours. I guess that makes it a good question. What IS it like to be me? hmmmmmmm. I could go a lot of directions with this post but I will go big picture for now....
To have a constant set of unknowns and changes seems to be the consistent factor in my life.
From moving 4 states in 7 years (living in 6 different places),
leaving full time ministry world to come at it from a different angle (building a bridge between business and ministry- this is who Brent & I are- Brent would be the man I am madly in love with and married 7 years ago
having 3 kids in 3 years with the last one being a BIG surprise (all while my husband finished his college degree) and
being a worship leader with an ever changing “congregation”.
Words come to mind like… exciting, unknown, adventurous, scary, fun, and crazy. I have learned to be independent, trusting, a constant student, forgiving, organized, go with the flow, pro active, discerning and in the end relying on faith in a God who works ALL things together for good partnering with us.
You will find me “on my face”- so to speak, well, ok, it’s more like in the car, without a shower, 2 kids in PJ’s, 1 dressed driving to preschool having some prayer time. You get the picture. I have learned to be talking to God in constant fashion trusting him for all the in-between stuff. And while trusting him for all the little things, I find myself constantly reading and searching for “answers” to a lot of major things I see going on in people’s lives, the world and in church. Sometimes I feel like I haven’t even scratched the surface of who God is. Culture – and I mean every sense of culture (church, school, media, home, etc) can create such a skewed view of God. I want to find complete purity in my view of God. I need more faith, I don’t have enough.
I guess I feel like a student who is suppose to have more answers and is always searching. I especially feel this way as a mom some days! I mean, really???!! You should have to have some sort of degree before becoming a parent!! And as a Christian, I want to have more answers to things… but I don’t. So what I can tell you is, God is SOO real and he is a friend who sticks closer than a brother, he is ALWAYS good and he has provision for every problem you have. His presence can walk you through anything AND he has a plan for you that you can’t fathom. Yup. he can take your everyday ordinary life and make it extraordinary. That's really what the "kingdom" is all about. dang it. I am getting preachy again. It's all those years in Bible school. ;)
Ok, so there is my long in depth answer to what’s it like to be me. Now, what’s it like to be me every day with my 3 kids (who are 4, 2 and 1)??? That’s a whole other story we’ll talk about more later.
